I used to chant the “YOLO I have no regrets” phrase with my friends until I realized this was a lie. I actually had a lot of regrets.
When you have a long list of regrets, life feels more painful. The most common regret people have on their deathbed is that they wished they were more courageous to live their truly wanted life.
So why are we not so courageous while we are alive? A few reasons are because we let our fears win over our desires, we put others’ expectations higher than our own, and we are afraid to stand out from the crowd.
If you don’t want this regret on your deathbed, there’s plenty of time to shift this! Keep reading for three key skills that will make sure you have fewer regrets and more memories!
Self-discovery is the first skill you want to develop to have fewer regrets. Without knowing what you want, it’s hard to know what you’re missing out on! This can start as a brainstorming list. Write this question at the top of the page and answer at least 20 things and challenge yourself to keep going for more: What lights me up?
The second great question is, What do I want to experience before I die? Challenge yourself to write as many things down, and the answers to these questions can become your bucket list of things to conquer! Now, if the idea of conquering these things in real life absolutely terrifies you, then allow yourself to use it as an imagination exercise. Let yourself dream and GO there without any pressure of doing it (yet).
Another great self-discovery avenue is jealousy! Notice when you feel jealous because it is the perfect trigger to uncover what you want. When you are mad that someone else has something and you don’t, there’s an opportunity for you to go deeper. Are you jealous because this person seems happier with “that” thing? Or is it something you truly want for yourself?
Self-doubt is one of the biggest joy blockers you can experience. It can be quite a crippling and paralyzing emotion. It stops you in the middle of your mojo. Had a great idea? WHOOP, there it went flying out the door as soon as self-doubt walked in. Sound familiar? You’re not alone.
This is why conquering self-doubt is huge to have fewer regrets. Self-doubt CREATES so many regrets simply because it makes us too scared to go after it.
The best way to tackle self-doubt is to face it head-on. Some great questions to reflect or journal on are: What am I so afraid of? So what if I fall flat on my face? Then what will happen? Follow the rabbit hole of where your biggest fear will lead you… and you’ll often find that the worst thing that can happen is a horrible feeling in your body. Perhaps humiliation, rejection, embarrassment. The good news is that feelings won’t kill you! They are a passing emotion.
The second part of conquering self-doubt is asking yourself the flip side questions: What will I gain from doing this? Will I regret it if I don’t do this? This last question has helped me conquer self-doubt SO many times. Simply asking if I will regret not doing this gave me the green light to GO do it!
Make it happen
Follow-through is true mastery. Some of you got this down, but others of you… get easily lost in the minutiae of life. And this is where your regrets are born! The good news is by the time you know yourself and have conquered your self-doubt, this step becomes MUCH easier.
How will you make your list of desires happen? Making a plan, placing it in your calendar, and coordinating with others to make it happen are great ways to do it. Perhaps you can make a decision that you will conquer one of your desires per month or once a quarter. You get to decide. Sometimes you can conquer it solo, other times with a friend or a group of people.
Most importantly, don’t make this a stressful exercise! Have FUN with it! The whole point of this is to have a FULLER life and enjoy your life on this planet more.
I am so excited to see you live a life of fewer regrets and MORE desires! Use these 3 skills to guide your adventure of life. Soon you will truly be living the “YOLO No Regrets” lifestyle. And you won’t be bummed on your deathbed because you were courageous enough to live the life you wanted. Isn’t that a beautiful thing?!
Aditi Ramchandani | Wellness Speaker | Psychedelic Guide at Mindbloom | Life Coach – Tools to Reduce Stress & Flourish